


Mistake

by SummerRaine14



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Angst, Declarations Of Love, Eventual Fluff, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-08
Updated: 2016-10-23
Packaged: 2018-05-31 02:19:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6451597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SummerRaine14/pseuds/SummerRaine14
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sorta an AU. Set after Gordon's trial ends.<br/>When Aaron rejects Robert he sets to leave the village, leaving a gift for Aaron. But when Aaron receives this gift, he begins to second guess his choice and tries to make things right with Robert.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jamesm97](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jamesm97/gifts).



> Another wonderful prompt from Jamesm97!  
> I will be making this a multi chapter fic, but it will take time for me to update.

They had been in a really good place. The past six months changed Aaron and Robert in more ways than words could say. Though there had definitely been tough days. Aaron was a wreck -as expected- through the trial, and Robert had no idea what to do. There were days when he felt like he wasn't enough to help Aaron. Days where the friendship they had worked so hard at fighting for came crashing down. Those days when words shared could killed. Words that began arguments that resembled their countless fights the previous year.

It was as Robert looked out the window, gazing deeply at the pouring rain as a village he called home passed by; He thought about the night everything completely changed. It wasn't a night far in the past, but one so recent. It was a night that never left his mind. 

-

"What's this?" Aaron asked, pointing to the key Robert just placed on his sister's kitchen table.  
"It's a key." Robert answered half cheerfully.  
"Well I can see that. I mean what's it for?"  
"I bought Victoria Cottage. It took some convincing considering Jimmy and Nicola aren't exactly my biggest fans. But they came around." Robert responded, with a small cocky smile on his face happy knowing he still has a way with words. Even when it comes to Nicola and Jimmy.  
"Why do you need your own place? Thought you were happy at Vic and Adam's."  
"I am. Seriously come on, I don't wanna be shacked up with my sister and husband the rest of my life. And if you and I-"  
"You and I?" Aaron interrupted him confused on where Robert was planning to go with his sentence.  
"Now that the trials over, I thought that we could finally give this-" Robert pointed between him and Aaron, "a proper chance." He finished in a lighter, somewhat embarrassed voice.  
"Rob, I know I said I wanted this. I still do. It's just now isn't the time." Aaron responded, tilting his head down afraid to look Robert in the eyes. "I-I uh gotta get back to the scrapyard." He added, before quickly exited Keeper's Cottage.  
-  
It had only been a few days since it happened, and the memory took up every bit of Robert's mind.  
Leaving Emmerdale wasn't Robert's first choice. He believed that him and Aaron could work things out, get past the phase where they're not together and finally just be together. But as each day passed, it felt like Robert and Aaron were growing apart more and more. It had become nearly impossible for Robert to see Aaron every day, and not be with him. Robert had only been on the train an hour, but it felt so much longer than that. That's how everything felt ever since the conversation-if you can call it that-with Aaron. Everyday was long. Longer than normal. It caused Robert to be in a constant loop of being stuck in his thoughts.  
As the ride continued his mind trailed off to his last encounter with his sister.

-

"Rob, why's your closet empty?" Vic asked as she ran down the stairs, stopping at the sight of her brother with packed bags. "What are you doing?" She continued.  
"Vic before you freak out, this isn't forever okay?"  
"No. Not 'okay'. You can't leave now. You need to be here. Aaron needs you to be here." Victoria used the power card against Robert-Aaron. Little did she know Aaron-in a way-is why her brother was leaving.  
"Aaron, right." Robert scoffed under his breath before continuing, "I just need some time away. I'll be back soon, I promise." Robert walked closer to his sister. Reaching out for a hug Victoria pushed her brother's arms away.  
"Yeah? How long is soon, a couple weeks? A month?" She asked, no longer capable of holding in her tears.  
"I just-I gotta go." Robert whispered turning away to pick his bags up, and walked out the door.  
-  
Victoria had tried ringing him a few times in the past few hours since he left the village. Probably just as Robert, not happy with how they left things. The last few months hadn't been easy on anyone. Whenever Robert needed to offload and felt like he couldn't bare his problems to Aaron, or they had one of their little rows he would turn to Victoria. She was the only one who truly understood how Robert felt. Of course she didn't know everything, but she knew enough. Vic was always a great person to help out with Aaron and Robert's problems. Only this time was different. This time she wouldn't be able to understand, she wouldn't be able to understand why Robert felt the need to leave. It just wouldn't make sense to her. Probably because it didn't completely make sense to Robert himself.  
He was very wary of leaving. Although he told Vic he wouldn't be gone long, a part of him felt like he was giving up on something. Robert would never admit it out loud, but he felt like he was giving up on him and Aaron. Robert knew he had to leave and not talk to Vic more because she'd be the first to tell him what he was doing wrong. He knew what he was doing was wrong, and just didn't want to face that reality. It was the last thing Robert wanted to do-leave Emmerdale-but he couldn't seem to find much more for him there besides Aaron.

Pulled away from his thoughts, Robert realizes the train has stopped at his destination. An old cottage he lived in during his time away from the village. Before and during some time of his relationship with Chrissie. His only home since being with Chrissie that came from his money. It was his, somewhere Robert constantly referred to as his escape. Chrissie never knew about the place. Besides his countless one night stands with men and women the only time he went to that place with someone was when he and Aaron were having an affair. They had come here a few times, Aaron was the only person who was a part of Robert's every day life that knew about the cottage. He felt like it was a good place to be. A good place to escape.  
The train passed by every three days, giving Robert some time alone, but also the chance to leave in a short distance of time. Also free of distractions. No cell service, no internet. Nothing. Though being left with nothing meant he was stuck with his thoughts may not be the best thing for Robert, in a way it's exactly what he needs. Maybe he could let the good memories of him and Aaron take over his thoughts of everything going on now. All the bad.  
As Robert entered the cottage, he looked around and everything was exactly how they left it. Robert smiled as he looked over to the couch and saw blankets and pillows draped messily across the couch. His smile soon fades thinking about how everything went wrong. This building is the place where they first talked about Aaron's scars. Looking back Robert mentally kicks himself for how he reacted. How he treated Aaron. Maybe that's why Aaron couldn't take him back? The fear of being hurt once again? 

Now knowing everything Aaron went through, Robert truly can't believe he said and did the things he did. Though a year ago Aaron said it was the grief of what he did to Jackson that caused him self harm, Robert knows that it was his sad excuse for a father that brought on the self hatred.  
Robert dropped his bags to the ground, and rummaged through one for a pen and paper. He walked over to the kitchen table, took a seat, and began writing. He began writing exactly what he felt he needed to get out of his system.  
As Robert finished writing, he's pulled out of his own little world by a loud knock at the door. Robert placed the pen down and made his way to the door. Opening it, he is thankful to see who is there.  
"Mr. Sugden."  
"Rishi. Thanks for coming." Robert responds, signalling for him to come inside.  
"You left earlier than expected. I was surprised to see your message with this address. Wasn't aware you owned another property. Any who, we weren't able to finish our conversation from the other day." Rishi states, Robert held in the need to eye rolling being fully aware he left. Given the fact that he was the one who left.  
"Yeah. I-I had to leave."  
"Okay well I just need you to sign this." Rishi responds, pulling a page from his brief case. "Now I'm obligated to ask all my clients this questions. Are you sure this is what you wanna do?"  
"Uh, yeah." Robert lies, trying to convince not only Rishi but himself as well. Taking the page from Rishi, he walks walks over to the kitchen table and picks up his pen. Robert hands Rishi the signed papers, but before Rishi can exit the cottage Robert calls after him.  
"Could you give this to Aaron?"  
Rishi turned around and took the sealed envelope from Robert, giving him a nod and exited the cottage.  
Robert once again being left alone in a dangerous mind state. 

A wave of regret washed over his body. That letter, those words written on the page in a way make everything so much more real. Like his signature and feelings on the paper were a goodbye.  
As Robert heard Rishi's car drive off, he made his way to the cellar.  
Robert pulled out a large bottle of scotch. The drink he learned was Aaron's favourite-besides a beer of course. They'd made their way through at least two bottles every time they were here. Not caring about a glass, Robert pulled the lid off and took a large swig.  
He made his way upstairs to the bedroom, and sat on the edge of the bed taking swig after swig until he began to lose control of his senses. Robert stumbled to the night stand, and placed the now-half-empty-bottle on it. Robert sat back down, pulling on the sheets to stop himself from falling back.  
As Robert began to feel a little more stable, he stood up and started walking to the bathroom. Beginning to feel light headed again, he gripped onto the sink counter. Looking up to see a mess of a man in the mirror. Robert barely recognized himself. He used to be so good at pretending, but now-now all his pain was written all over his face. Robert looked down from the mirror, not able to look at himself.  
For the first time since leaving Emmerdale only a few hours prior, Robert let himself ask the one question he constantly tried to avoid.  
"Does Aaron even love me?" The words slipped messily off his lips.  
Robert rubbed his face, and looked back in the mirror. The pain still written so clearly across his face, but now only seconds later his anger noticeable as well.  
He wasn't just hurt from Aaron's rejection, but angry too. Angry that he spent months proving day in and day out how much Aaron meant to him. With some sort of hope that they could be together properly, only to wish he could go back in time and not put his heart on the line. Robert was grateful to win Aaron's trust back, but he's never taken any rejection well. He usually pretends to be mad at the one who threw him in the other direction, instead of hurt. Throwing insults out, and holding the hurt on the inside. Though it's never been easy to do that with Aaron. Of course he has in the past, he gave an Oscar worthy performance in September. Hiding away every bit of truth, and giving nothing but lies to the man he loved. But now would give anything to take it back.  
With Aaron it's always been nearly impossible to hide what Robert was feeling. God just another reason why he had to leave Emmerdale.  
Robert knew all it would take for him to break would be one movement or word from the wrong person about him and Aaron. The village was filled with things and people that reminded him of Aaron. Of course this place held it's memories as well. Only he could break here and no one would know. Maybe that made him a coward, not wanting to show his vulnerable side to a whole bunch of people that knew him. Robert hated thinking about it though. Even without Aaron around, he knew it was him that made Robert realize how much of a coward he really is. Signing those papers proved it even more. Once again running away when he's not able to face the cause of his pain. 

With one more look in the mirror at an emotion filled man, Robert turned towards the door and the washroom. He went back to his bedroom and grabbed the bottle of scotch, before stumbling down the stairs and onto the chair in front of the window.  
Robert looked out his surroundings, seeing nothing more than figures behind the rain and he let himself get lost again before fading off to sleep.


	2. As I Read Your Words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron receives Robert's letter and is left in a shocked state.

Aaron had been wary of giving Robert a ring all day. The last time they really talked was when Aaron walked away from the chance at a real relationship with the man he loved. Since then there had been the odd 'hi' when they had a run in on the streets or at the Woolpack. Aaron hadn't thought much of making conversation, he truly didn't know how to. But today was different. Today he felt like there was this need inside of him to talk to Robert. Maybe it was because he hadn't seem him in the last two days which was unusual. Although they had barely talked, they got glimpses of each other everyday. It was odd to say the least that Aaron hadn't seen Robert out at all.

Aaron went about his day like he normally would. A shower and quick thing to eat before running off to the scrap yard. Adam was taking the day off to visit Holly in rehab, so Aaron was in charge of everything. Not that, that was difficult. It was a slow day, no customers and just finishing up on the monthly bookings. An easy day, everything was done before lunch. Though Aaron was thankful that the workload was taken care of, he wasn't exactly happy to be stuck with nothing to do. After grabbing something to eat from David's shop, Aaron stood alone on the bridge and pulled out his phone.  
He stared blankly at Robert's number for a good five minutes, with his hands shaking over the 'call' button, before turning his cell off and pushing it back into his pocket.  
After another moment of complete silence as he stared out onto the water, Aaron turned away and headed to the Woolpack.

Arriving back at his home it was like the usual lunch time. A busy crowd, and a busy Chas behind the bar. Too busy to notice Aaron come in and go through the back, which he was quite happy for. Aaron loved his mother and lately hadn't been bothered by her constant nagging, but something about today Aaron knew he wouldn't be able to handle her pecking his head in.  
It felt nice to walk into a quiet room. Of course the scrapyard and bridge were quiet and much more private, but Aaron felt better knowing there was alcohol right around the corner from where he was watching the telly.  
As Aaron faded off to sleep out in the pub Chas was greeted by Rishi. 

"What can I do for ya?" Chas asked moving away from Nicola and Jimmy, over to Rishi.  
"I'm looking for that son of yours." He responded quickly.  
"Pretty sure he's up at the yard. Why you looking for him?"  
"Sorry Chas that's confidential. I was up at the yard and he's not there." Rishi said, irritation clear in his voice as he wants nothing more than to get this job done. Rishi had barely been in the Woolpack since his face had a run in with Zak's fist a few months prior. He had become less of a fan of the Dingle lot then he had been before.  
"I didn't see him come through, but he could've went round' if ya wanna check in the back." 

Without a response Rishi was past the bar and through the back. He walked in quickly unaware of the fact that Aaron was asleep. But with the loud shut of the door, Aaron woke startled. He was expecting his mother, but surprised to see Rishi being the one standing behind him.

"Just the person I was looking for-" Rishi began before being cut off.  
"Why?"  
"I have something for you." Rishi answered, as he dug through his bags to only find the letter from Robert. "Shit. Okay take this, I'll be back with the other thing as soon as possible." He said, handing Aaron the sealed envelope.

All it took was one look at the writing of Aaron's name and he knew exactly who this was from. Aaron knew that messy excuse for writing from anywhere. Robert. This was from Robert. Aaron ripped open the envelope and pulled out the letter. He took a seat back on the couch and braced himself for what he was going to read. This was Robert, Aaron knew something serious was meant to come out of what he was gonna read. 

'Aaron, I've never done anything like this before so bare with me. You can call me a coward for not being able to say these things to your face, when you see me again, but I can't tell you when that will be. Mostly because I'm not so sure of that myself. We met over a year ago, and then I was so sure of what my life was going to be. I knew exactly what I wanted, what I thought I wanted. It was Chrissie, she was my life plan. I'd marry her and have the money, job, flash cars and the 'dream life' as some would call it. But when I met you all of that changed, of course I tried to pretend it didn't. I didn't want to lose Chrissie, ignoring everything else I got from being with her I thought I loved her. But those feelings don't even compare to what I feel for you.' 

Aaron looked up from the letter and wiped away the tears he felt beginning to roll down his cheeks, before returning to reading.

'I've made a lot of mistakes, done things that are unforgivable. Things that I regret more than words can say. Looking back on you and I, I can't pin point the exact moment I fucked up, because truth be told our entire affair consisted of me screwing up. A part of me feels like I should've let you go before I got married, or when Chas and Cain threatened me to stay away. But I didn't, and that was selfish. If I had known then what I know now I would have never hurt you the way I did. Or I would've tried not to. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I understand why you wouldn't take me back. You deserve much more than what I can give you, as much as I wish that wasn't true. In the envelope holding this letter you'll find a key. The same key I showed you the other day. I've decided to leave the village for a while, and Victoria Cottage now belongs to you.'

Aaron could swear his heart skipped a beat. What did this mean? He thought. There was no way this was Robert's goodbye. After everything they had been through for him to leave. Out of disbelief Aaron grabbed the ripped envelope off the coffee table and prayed to god their was no key in there. Only to be left disappointed in what he saw. It was true, the key was there. As reality began to sink in more and more, Aaron's breathing became heavier. The tears he was wiping away only moments ago now freely falling.

Completely ignoring the fact that Rishi and his mother just entered the back room, Aaron pushes past them out into the bar. Signalling out the calls from his mother telling him to come back, Aaron barges out the door and over to Keeper's Cottage. It's a good thing Adam's with his sister today. As Aaron draws closer to Vic's cottage, he see's through the window that she is inside.  
Without knocking he storms into the cottage, startling Vic completely. 

"Aaron? Aaron are you okay?" She asked, getting up from the couch and walking over to her friend.  
"Am I okay? Am I okay?" Aaron scoffed, before continuing, "No I'm not okay Vic! Where the hell is your brother?"  
"I-I don't know." She responded shamefully wishing she could help her friend.  
"Vic I mean it okay. If you know where he is, you need to tell me." Aaron said, trying to calm himself down knowing it wasn't right to lash out on Victoria when none of this was her fault.  
"Aaron I'm not lying when I tell you I have no idea where he is. All I know is that he left earlier today, like really early. I've tried ringing him, but it goes straight to voice mail. Either his phone's off or he's got no reception. Aaron I'm sorry."  
As soon as Aaron heard the words 'no reception,' he began to settle down a bit more. Going off a long shot, Aaron felt like he knew where Robert might be. Determined to figure out whether or not he was right, and to find Robert, Aaron sight in a lighter tone than how he was talking before, "It's-it's okay. Look I gotta get going. I'm sorry for freaking out." Not waiting for a response to see if Victoria was forgiving Aaron for his freak out, he ran out of Keeper's Cottage faster than he had entered. 

Arriving at the pub once again, Aaron flew through the front room and into the back. Only this time not going unnoticed by his mother, who followed behind him along side Rishi. Aaron ignored their presence around him for the second time, and ran upstairs to his room. He pulled out a bag from his closet, and rummaged through his drawers looking for at least a night's worth of clothing. If Robert was where Aaron thought he was, they'd be there for two days before a train could pick em' up. Aaron's car wouldn't make it out there, but he knew a few buses that could get him close enough to walk to the cottage. It'll be a journey to say the least, but a journey Aaron's prepared to take if it means figuring things out with Robert once and for all.  
"Aaron love what are you doing?" Chas asked the concern written through her tone of voice and the expression on her face.  
"I'm going away for a couple days. Nothing to worry yourself over." Aaron responded, trying to push past his mother and Rishi who were blocking his exit at the doorway.  
"I'm sorry to bother you, but I really need you to sign these papers." Rishi spoke, as Aaron got closer to leaving with every step he took.  
Aaron turned around with fire and anger in his eyes, "I'm not signing your damn papers!" He yelled, before leaving the house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the shortness of this chapter, hopefully the next one will be longer.  
> Thanks for reading!x


	3. Finding Our Way Back To Us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron goes to find Robert in hopes of making things right between them

It was a long way for Aaron. From getting a taxi to Hotten, then taking the bus to London before meeting the closest stop he could take. The last bus stop was a 30 minute walk to the Cottage. The wet weather didn't help with Aaron's feelings about the whole thing at all. He reached Robert's secret get away home around 11 pm.  
Aaron stood outside the door trying to catch his breath and contain his anger. There would always be love underlining the surface of Aaron and Robert's relationship, but right now anger filled Aaron's every bone as he thought about Robert just leaving the way he did. Knowing he couldn't let that show, Aaron stood alone for a few moments before searching through the mailbox over full of things Robert probably didn't bother to take out. Junk mail he didn't need or want. Finally reaching the bottom, Aaron grabbed the spare key.

Aaron quietly entered the cottage only to be surprised at the sight of Robert wide awake walking towards the living room.  
"Aa-Aaron" Robert stuttered.  
"What the hell is this?" Aaron yelled holding up the letter Robert left for him, and the anger he tried to contain before coming inside now resurfacing and taking control.  
"Okay getting right to the point, I guess." Robert responded softly, tilting his head down ashamed to look Aaron in the eyes.  
"No. No you don't get to do that. You can't look away and be upset!" Aaron said in a raised voice, moving himself closer to Robert.  
Robert knew the feeling all too well. As Aaron brought himself closer to him, moments from their past started flashing through Robert. Feelings that had been pushed away by both men over the year since their tragic affair was revealed, came bubbling up to the surface once again. It scared Robert to think about all those times they stood so close together and how it turned into so much more. It scared Aaron to bring himself close to Robert not knowing what to do. It scared both men to be in the presence of each other, alone and in love for the first time since everything seemed to crash down.  
"Robert!" Aaron yelled, shaking Robert out of his thoughts and causing him to face the man in front of him.  
"Okay. Okay, just don't freak out." Robert said in almost a whisper, as he headed towards the sofa asking Aaron to follow him. 

Robert sat on the sofa, and waited for a moment before Aaron sat on the coffee table across from him. Again opposite of each other, and close enough to feel the other's breathing. Aaron set his bag down on the ground between him and Robert, and placing the letter beside him on the table. Despite Aaron's protest against it only a few moments prior, Robert tilted his down trying to avoid any eye contact with the man in front of him. After collecting himself and working up the nerves to be honest Robert looked back up still avoiding Aaron's eyes and said, "It was stupid. Trust me, I know that."  
"Trust you?" Aaron scoffed, before quickly adding, "Robert, I don't get it."  
"I know I said I'd wait for you, and I have it's just-it's been hard. Do you not realize it's almost been a year since the last time we really kissed? This sounds insane but I miss you, i miss being with you." Robert stopped himself before he could say anything else that in his mind was stupid. Robert had never done this. Yes, he had declared his love for Chrissie time and time again, but that was to simply buy her trust. It wasn't the same all those times with her as it is now with Aaron. With Aaron this is the god's honest truth, and the last thing Robert wants to do is pull a move from a Nicholas Sparks novel by confessing everything he feels for Aaron. The letter was one thing, they were words written on paper. But to say something about his feelings his person, it's too much for Robert. Maybe it will always be too much as he has grown to be the kind of man who lies, however he'll try to let Aaron knows how he feels. Trying to hold in his desperation for a response Robert whispers, "Please say something."  
"I-I didn't know you felt that way." Aaron choked trying to hold in his tears at this genuine, raw honesty from a man a year ago he thought would never be so real with him.  
"I told you in the park that night that I wanted you Aaron. When I bought the cottage it was for us, well it was until well you know."  
Aaron inched himself closer to Robert, nearly completely off the coffee table, "I know that. I just thought that you were saying those things to make me feel better-"  
"Aa-" Robert began, before feeling the touch of Aaron's rough hands against his.  
"No, let me finish. This-us a year ago, hell a few months ago was a disaster. When I told Chrissie about the affair I hated myself, because despite what you did to Paddy a part of me still hoped that now that she knew you would choose me. Of course I wouldn't have admitted that then, because Paddy he's like me dad but they were always there...my feelings for you." Aaron lifted one hand up to wipe away the tears that began to roll down his cheeks. "They still are."  
With these words Robert looked up from their joined hands and his eyes met with Aaron's. Although there was a fear of looking into Aaron's eyes and getting lost like he had all those other times, Robert couldn't hold back the small foolish smile that creeped on his face at the realization that Aaron did still have feelings for him.  
"I thought that because-"  
"Because I freaked out about the key, I didn't wanna be together?" Aaron interrupted. Robert shook his head not so surprised at how well Aaron knows him. "We're not Andy and Chrissie. We can give a relationship a shot without moving in together." Aaron joked, taking the opportunity Robert usually does to make a light joke out of a hard situation.  
Robert chuckled along with Aaron, as the tension that had filled up the room was now disappearing. "We certainly are not them."  
As their chuckles became softer the unasked and unanswered questions were still there, "Robert, you gave me a house...how long were you planning on being away for?" Aaron asked.  
"Do you ever think about the future?" Robert questioned.  
"Not really no." Aaron responded, remembering the last time he was asked this question by Robert. What it led to, and how he felt afterwards.  
"I have these past few weeks." Robert said, mirroring his exact words from over a year ago when he nearly bared his heart out to Aaron in the back room of the pub. "I thought that I could walk away from the village, from us and move on. Only ever since you rejected me...Aaron I've felt alone. God it scares me being alone."  
"Then why'd you leave?" Aaron asked, confused about if Robert was so scared of being alone, why he would go somewhere that caused him to be alone.  
"It scares me being alone. But I'd rather be here in this vacant building, than seeing you everyday not knowing exactly how you feel. Because that-not knowing how you feel about me, would make me feel more alone than anything else."  
"I've been alone Robert. It's the worst thing a person can go through. I don't want you to be alone, and I don't want to be alone."  
"Does that mean?" Robert asked, leaving the sentence unfinished with hopes of Aaron finishing it with the response he wanted.  
"We can give this a shot?" Aaron chuckled, "If you don't hate me for being a bit late on saying yes."  
Robert gripped Aaron's hands tighter and said, "I think it's me who's been a bit late."  
"Yeah." Aaron agreed without any hesitation. 

"You brought a bag?" Robert stated, after minutes of silence passed by the men.  
"Yeah, I remember how it was when we were out here. Let me guess, bus won't make another stop for what two days?"  
"You could've brought your car." Robert said, trying to hold in his laughter at his full knowledge that there is no way Aaron's car could get out here.  
"Oh shut up and move over." Aaron demanded as he pushed Robert over, and joined him on the couch.  
They sat side by side, before Robert picked up the remote and turned the television on. Hands still intertwined the men got comfortable and began to fall into each other. Getting used to each other's bodies again, the feel of being so close and personal. The comfort of being together, and the relaxation of freedom. They have had their moments over the past few months together. Sitting at the Woolpack having a pint, or even watching a football game on Victoria's couch at Keeper's Cottage, but it's never been like this. Not even when they were having the affair. Despite being with one and another so many times over their eight months in private, the love, comfort, peace and freedom they feel now was never there. This is all so new, a new sense of closeness and emotions that were once non existent or maybe not on top of the surface finally showing.

Letting go of the past and finally accepting everything they've felt for over a year, Aaron and Robert let themselves love. Love not only each other and the peace they're surrounded by being away from the village, but their love for themselves. Neither of the men realized it until tonight, but what they needed to do in order to be together was admit how each of them felt. No only with each other but themselves. When Robert said it scared him being alone, this time full of genuine emotion and not under the influence of alcohol it was him baring his feelings for Aaron without the stress of the trial. Aaron also letting himself bare his feelings he nearly killed himself trying to keep from Robert. 

Both men were damaged in their own ways. Who would have thought that what they needed was just to be together and to lay out the honesty of their once-denied feelings to come to terms with their own flaws and faults. That the presence of one and another was all it would take for them to deal with their own self hatred and fears. The way the men started off their day neither would have imagined this is where it would end up. Together, and for the first time both of them completely sure of what they want. Which is each other. Because they found their way to a love they once thought was lost and would never get back. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had fun writing this chapter, because some emotional heart-to-hearts are a personal fave of mine. I also really wanted to focus on the fact that both men had some work on themselves as well as their relationship together. Which I will be continuing to talk about as the story progresses.  
> Thanks for reading!x


	4. A Mess Of A Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron and Robert have to face that they accepted their feelings for each other, with more than one problem in their way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise I have not forgotten about this fic, I've just had a lot going on. Also started a new fic (which would mean a lot if you amazing people checked it out) I'm hoping my next update won't be so far apart from this one but I don't know what's gonna happen.

Aaron woke in the late morning to a loud knock at the door. It took him a moment to fully open his eyes, and notice what was happening. But when he did, there was no hesitation to him jumping back off the couch. The last time Aaron and Robert spent the night together in a bed or on a couch was during their affair. The last time they were even in a house over night alone together was that painful night back in January.  
Aaron loved Robert there was no question about that, but with everything they've been through he's just not ready to spent nights together in each other's arms again. Of course they could fall right back into it, the familiar feel of one another's bodies, but that's not what getting this chance at a real relationship is about.  
It didn't take long for Aaron to be pulled from his thoughts, as someone knocked loud on the door again. He walked backwards from the place he was standing in front of the couch and headed over towards the door.  
Aaron pulled it open, and couldn't keep a confused look off his as a family of strangers stood in front of him. It was a family of six, by the looks of things anyway.A father, mother, three teenagers, and one toddler.  
"Uh-Can I-Can I help you?" Aaron asked stumbling over his words.  
"We took a wrong turn detouring through a small town near by, tried to turn back around but the car came to stop just stopped. There's no cell reception, we were wondering if we could use your phone." The father spoke.  
"We don't have a landline or reception here, but I know my ways around a car if you want me to check it out" Aaron offered.  
"Really? That would be amazing, thank you so much." The mother's face beamed up. It seemed as though she was happy to get on the go more than anyone else.  
Aaron turned into the living room and walked over to the side of the couch for his shoes, before quickly fleeding out the door. 

The family leaded him to the car, which was stopped not too far away from the house. It was more than clear to Aaron with how close they were to Robert's place that they took a wrong turn. Only places they'd get to by coming this way would be into the woods, which would eventually lead to town-after hitting over a hundred trees on the way through or onto train tracks.  
It didn't take Aaron long to figure out what was wrong with the car. He pushed the hood down and turned to the elder man who seemed to the father and said,  
"Your battery is dead, only way you're getting outta here is with a boost. But chances of getting one out here are slim to none." Aaron said, then hesitated before offering they stay up at the cottage with him and Robert until they can find a way back onto the road.  
"I'm Mark, thank you son." The father said, reaching his hand out to Aaron, who pulled his hand forward and shook the older man's hand.  
The family followed Aaron back to the cottage, and were greeted by a worried Robert. "Where the hell have you been?" Robert asked in concern, not realizing there was a trail of people behind Aaron. "What's this?" He asked as he saw the family enter the door.  
"Let's go upstairs and talk." Aaron said directing Robert to the stairs, before leaving eye sight of the family he turned around and said, "Just make yourselves comfortable."  
"Aaron try and explain to me why there is a family of complete strangers with you in my place." Robert demanded, annoyed that his time with Aaron only a day after getting together is interrupted.  
"Their car broke down, the weather is crap and by the seems of things they don't know how to get anywhere from here."  
Robert wanted to yell and scream in anger, but part of the reason he loved Aaron so much was his selfless heart. He couldn't be angry over this, when Aaron was just doing what came so natural to him.  
"Well it's not like we can keep them here."  
"I know." Aaron sighed. "I was thinking, remember last time we were here and we went for a walk into town through the woods?" Robert nodded in agreement as the memory came to him. "We just walk into town, get some reception and call Cain here with his tow truck or just to boost em'." Aaron didn't always think ahead, and make plans but when he did they were really good plans. Robert couldn't deny he was smart, and obviously thought about this. But there was one problem that bothered Robert, one he needed to address.

"Aaron, this is my escape place. Chrissie never knew about it, only one person besides myself and Rishi in the village know about this place and that's you. I don't want someone we know and see everyday to know about this place. Especially not Cain. Nothing against him, but he's too close to the both of us and I just want one place that can be mine. Maybe even ours." Robert found himself getting more emotional with every word he spoke, and didn't know how to stop it.  
Aaron had seen Robert emotional on numerous accounts, but never like this, over something like this.  
"Okay, Rob, we don't need to tell him this is your place, or we can- we can talk to a mechanic in town. Complete stranger, won't know us and won't ever think about us or this place again." Aaron said, trying to stop himself from getting emotional as well.  
"Whatever." Robert growled, pushing his way through the bedroom door.  
Robert stormed downstairs, to see the family still standing silent at the front door.  
"Make yourselves comfortable." He snarled, repeating Aaron's words to them from a few minutes prior.  
Aaron caught this action as he watched from the stairs, "Robert." He said, trying to get him to talk about this before doing something himself.  
"I'm going for a walk." Robert snapped at Aaron, before disappearing through the front door. 

The family had confused looks scattered across their faces as Aaron re-entered the living room. He had a look stone on his face.  
"Um..." Was all the teenage girl could let you before Aaron said,  
"Don't worry about him."  
Without another word, he took a seat on the couch and flicked on the television. Under his breathe in hope no one else could hear him Aaron whispered, "Come on. Come back Robert." 

Half an hour passed and Aaron didn't even realize it until Mark spoke up, "Son, that friend of yours has been gone for a while."  
Aaron looked over to him, he was now sitting on the chair with his wife and toddler child. Aaron could've smiled at the beautiful family that was in front of him, instead he kept his look of stone and said, "He knows the area pretty well. Just out for a walk, he'll be fine." Aaron didn't believe the words himself, and that hurt even more because he had no idea where Robert could have went.  
"You know, you can pretend you don't care. But you're a man in love, we're not blind and your eyes say it all." The mother said.  
"Look, I don't know what y'all think you know, but I am fine." Aaron lied to himself and the family.  


Angry with Robert and not able to sit down any longer, Aaron rose from the couch and went to the kitchen. He looked through the cupboards and fridge. Of course the fridge was empty, and the only food he was able to find was boxes and bags of noodles and some cans of sauce. Thankfully Robert kept pots and pans in the cottage, so he was able to cook something. Aaron didn't wanna cook something, but he knew he needed to find something to distract himself and there wasn't much else to do.  
"Want something to eat?" Aaron asked, shaking a box of noodles in the air so everyone in the living room could see what he was making.  
Mark said 'no', as an answer for himself, the kids, and his wife. Aaron responded with a mumbled 'okay' before starting to cook.  
By the time he had finished cooking an hour passed. Aaron pulled a plate out of the high cupboard, and dished himself some food. Instead of joining the 'company' in the living room, he went to the kitchen table and pulled out a chair to sit alone with his food.  
As Aaron finished eating, he began to think and realized that sitting alone with his thought was the last thing he should be doing.  
"Y'all know my name. Think it's only fair I learn all of yours." Aaron said, breaking the silence that lingered over them for over twenty minutes. The family looked at Aaron surprised in his sudden interest to speak.  
"You can learn our names, ask us a million question, but you're still gonna have problems with that boyfriend of yours." Mark said bluntly.  
Aaron couldn't deny that Mark was a smart and wise guy. One that must have lived quite the life to know the things he does. But instead of admitting he thought that, Aaron simply smirked and nodded his head to Mark's comment.  
Mark was about to speak again, but was stopped by the opening of the door behind him. Him and his wife didn't turn around, until they saw the look across Aaron's face. Everyone expected it to be Robert standing at the front door, but were all shocked to see an un-familiar face. Well it was more than familiar to Aaron.  
"Who's car am I boosting?" Cain said, leaving everything straight forward and not making eye contact with Aaron. He didn't know for sure, but Aaron took a pretty big guess that Robert must have had said something to Cain about them.  
"That would be mine." Mark said, getting up from the chair to shake hands with Cain. It was no secret to those that knew him, that Cain wasn't one of the most pleasant guys to be around. Unlike Aaron, Cain didn't pull his hand out for a hand shake, he simply nodded his head and went out the door. Mark and his family followed Cain through, leaving Aaron alone. 

Out by the car was Robert standing beside Cain's tow truck, as the family and Cain got closer to him he didn't move one bit. Staying exactly in his place, refusing to look or talk to anyone.  
It didn't take Cain long to boost the car, he said that with the rest it had while they were waiting the battery powered up a bit on it's own. With quick 'thank you's' and 'goodbye's' the family were back in their car and on the road again in no time.  
After they left, Cain began walking to the house and felt Robert following behind him. Cain turned around and demanded, "Wait here."  
It was no secret Robert was absolutely terrified of Cain, so without any more words he backed up to the truck and stood silent and still once again. 

Cain stormed into the cottage, "Get your shit let's go!" He said louder than he needed to, with Aaron sitting not even five feet away from him.  
Aaron looked up from the ground and asked confused, "Why?"  
"Just get your's and Robert's shit." Cain repeated, before exiting the house.  
Aaron grabbed his bags quickly, and followed Cain outside. He stopped in his tracks, when he noticed Robert standing by the truck. "Both of you get your asses in the truck." Although both of the men were confused with Cain's demands, they knew not to question what he was doing as that has gotten them both into bad situations before. Aaron jumped in the back of the truck, and Robert opened the door he was standing beside and got into the front. 

\--

They drove for about forty minutes, before Cain pulled to a stop in a motel parking lot in Hotten. "Uh, Cain what are we doing here?" Aaron asked.  
"The two of you obviously have some stuff that needs to be worked out, and we all know that it'll never happen in the village. So you're gonna stay here for however long you need, this way you're alone but no so far away I need to drive my ass out somewhere to get you dumb asses." With everything that had happened over the past few months, everyone was starting to think Cain had gone soft, Aaron and Robert both chuckled as this proved that was not the case.  
"What are you going to tell everyone?" Robert asked.  
"It's Emmerdale, once people notice you're both not in the village, there will be plenty of stories going 'round. I don't need to say anything. Now get the outta my truck, so I can get home to my wife." Aaron and Robert both nodded, before exiting the car.  
They stood in silence, as they watched Cain drive off. It was the late afternoon, and both men knew they were in for a long night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm planning on maybe two more chapters with this. I know exactly where I wanna go, it's just figuring out how to get there that's the issue.


	5. Only Human

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aaron admits why he was more than okay with not spending the day alone with Robert

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really shitty with how long I leave between updates, and I'm sorry but just life is complicated.  
> For anybody who's still reading this story, until next time I hope you enjoy this chapter!

They were standing outside of the motel, rain clearly about to fall and nothing but an uneasy feeling between them. Robert went to speak but before he could, Aaron turned away and walked into the motel.

"Room for 2 please" Before the desk clerk could do anything Robert stepped forward and added,

"1 bed" Aaron looked at him with a shy smile. Although he didn't exactly want to be alone with Robert for another night right now, he was happy no matter what happened in that day, that he was still there and obviously not going anywhere.

"Alright" The clerk responded, she headed to the back to get them a key for the room and Robert took the opportunity to speak.

"What is going on with you? You came to my place the other night wanting to be together, away from the village, yet so quick to let a group of strangers take away our day together?"

Aaron wanted to respond, but he had yet to find the right words to describe his feelings about everything and instead waited for the clerks return with their room key. Robert scoffed and stepped towards the doors, obviously ready to get to their room as soon as possible. The clerk returned not too soon after, and they were set for room 143 on the other side of the building.

The walk to their room was quiet, except for the sound of hard-pouring rain hit the ground and roof tops.

\--

Robert threw his bag on the ground beside the queen sized bed and lied down, letting out a loud sigh. Aaron stormed into the bathroom after tossing the key onto the nightstand on the other side of their bed. 

In the bathroom Aaron found himself getting dizzy and grabbed the counter to hold him up. He looked the mirror and was nothing more or less than disgusted with himself. Robert was right, what was point of travelling all that way to not be completely honest about his feelings? So much had happened between them, but no matter how much progress they made it constantly felt like they were taking one step forward and two steps back. "Communication is key" Aaron remembered his therapist once telling him in a session a few months back. He had never admitted it to anyone, but something he talked about more often than not in his sessions were his feelings for Robert. Even when everyone, including Aaron and Robert themselves believed Aaron hated Robert, his therapist somehow knew exactly what to get out of him and definitely left an impression. He pulled himself together, and realized that the only way him and Robert could ever work as a couple is by working on their problems. So after one more deep breathe, Aaron left the washroom and stood at the door before speaking, 

"Robert. I'm sorry."

Robert popped up and turned around facing Aaron. He didn't know Aaron was standing there, nor for how long. "What for?" 

"Today. Last night. Everything." Aaron answered, as he walked over to the bed and sat down. Robert was about to speak, but Aaron stopped him and continued, "It's just, you seem to know what you want. Or you did..you left me a key for a house Robert. I understand that you're the kinda guy to go full out on some things, it's one of the things I'm attracted to about you. But you're moving fast-"

"I'm moving fast? Aaron, you're the one who came for me the other day. I didn't ask for that. That was all you." Robert interrupted.

"I know" Aaron said as he tilted his head down, "I just want to take things slow, alright?"

"That's it? You let a family full of strangers into the house for the day, ignored me up until now, and almost asked for tow separate beds because you wanna take things slow?" 

"Yeah. Just being alone for you for a night was one thing, but the entire day..it scared me Rob. And tonight, I just figured you didn't want to deal with me."

Robert wanted to laugh at the stupidity coming out of mouth of the man he loves, but instead he thought about. Aaron has his insecurities, Robert knew this long ago, and he respected them. Because although he'd never admit it, he had his own insecurities as well. Robert, just like Aaron was only human after all. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, sorry this is so short. I'll try and have a longer one up within the next two weeks


	6. Home Sweet Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After working through their issues at the motel. Aaron and Robert decide it's time to return to the village.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is the last chapter. I just felt like instead of dragging it out much longer, a nice simple last chapter was the best way to go.  
> Enjoy!

They had woken up late in the morning, lucky for the boys still some time to spare before check out. When Aaron finally opened his eyes, and got out bed Robert wasn't in the room. Instead of sitting around and waiting for his boyfriend's return, Aaron went into the washroom and cleaned himself up. By the time he was done, Robert had returned.

"Where were you?" Aaron asked, before noticing the coffee tray sitting on the bed side table.

"Cafe down the road a bit, went to get something for us." He pointed to the table, making Aaron notice there was also a bag, most likely with bagels inside. "Hey, it's almost check out time. But a walk-in motel like this probably isn't getting much business. Do you want me to pay for the room another night or-"

"No" Aaron stopped him quick. "I'm ready to go back to Emmerdale. We have to get back to our real live sometime and we talked last night so." Robert shook his head in agreement. Even if he would want more time alone with Aaron, he respects the wishes of the man he loves. Proving once again, how far he's come since they met two years ago. "I'll call Cain. See if he can grab us." Robert's face begins to heat up. He'll never admit it, but Cain Dingle scares the shit out of him, and being in a vehicle with him again is almost too much for Robert to handle. Aaron notices the redness beginning to appear on Robert's face and he suggests, "Or we can just take a bus back into the village?" Robert smiled in agreement, clearly much more comfortable with that idea. "I'll just go check the schedule outside." Aaron added, before getting up and heading out the door. 

-

Sitting alone, Robert took a deep breathe and let a genuine smile fall upon his face.  _I finally have Aaron_ he thought. Of course Robert had already had him before. But after being rejected he didn't think they'd actually stand a chance again. Yet here they were. Spending a few nights alone, with heart-to-hearts and more understanding of each other. This time it wasn't a forced thing, them being brought together by a terrible tragedy, but simply to men who loved each other and wanted to be together. 

-

Aaron and Robert arrived back in the village 3 hours later. Instead ofstopping at Vic and Adam's, or the pub, then men went back to the house Robert had previously left for Aaron. The house that was now their home. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you haven't, it would mean a lot to me if you guys checked out my other Robron fic, "Trying To Forget The Past" and I'm also taking prompts for one-shots or possibly multi chapters!

**Author's Note:**

> For the sake of this fic, we're gonna pretend Jimmy, Nicola, Angelica, Elliot and Carl don't live in Victoria cottage. But Jimmy still owns it.  
> As always comments and kudos are appreciated! Thanks for reading!


End file.
